Traditions Touch Us, They Connect Us, & They Expand Us
Loss is an experience that is hard to understand or wrap your mind around unless you have experienced it first-hand. Each person’s experiences with loss are unique, and the severity of after-effects can differ greatly. In some situations, people have time to expect, plan, and talk about things before the passing of a loved one. But for others, the experience can be sudden and unexpected and not allow for much time to properly process what they’re going through. Both experiences aren’t easy, and you will likely always miss having that loved one in your life the way they were before passing. Emotions will probably come in waves, and certain things will likely trigger you now, whereas before, you would not second guess those things.
McCormack’s book, Grieving: A Beginners Guide, touches on the uniqueness of loss and grief and helps to explain what families can expect after loss. Three key points that we feel are important to share from this book are the parts covering pain, reorienting, and transforming. We will spend some time expanding on them in this post. The loss of a loved one is a big change and requires people to make adjustments to heal and have a positive outlook. For some, memorializing their loved one can be overwhelming or challenging, confusing what and how you should keep that person’s legacy alive.
Lee comments in her book Grief is Love: Living with Loss that someone’s legacy is not about others; instead, it’s deeply personal and solely about you. It is simply about how you choose to live as a result of her life and something you can embrace by creating meaningful traditions. Through these new traditions, we can keep their spirit and essence alive and let our love for them continue. The care team at Greenlawn Funeral Home would encourage you to be kind to yourself first and, when it feels right, consider what their legacy means to you. Legacy is based on the fact that there was someone you loved dearly and who loved you back, and that love now lives on through you.
Managing your emotional pains
How do I feel about their death?
How am I managing my grief?
Is there anything I need to change?
Do I need to reach out to someone?
Meaningful ways to reorient your love
How can I help other grieving family members?
How well am I adjusting to the changes?
What brings me a sense of comfort?
What draws me closer to them now?
Transforming their loss and your grief
What did I learn from them?
What things do I miss the most?
What is one value I admire in them?
How can I do something to remember them?
The healing journey of grief is lifelong and everchanging hence why we encourage our families to identify and embrace things that can bring you closer to them. We would love to take time with you to process and plan options to memorialize them as you see fit. Get in contact with us, and together we can create something that will be everlasting that will honor the person’s life and supports your needs. Or maybe you need to share this article with other loved ones and be the leader within your family to have these harder conversations about what they meant and what you feel is only right to do to honor them. Creating new traditions is okay.